You’ve read the blogs, bought the tiny potty, and stocked up on stickers. But your toddler? They’re more interested in flushing the toilet for fun than actually using it. Welcome to the wild world of potty training — equal parts comedy, unexplained wetness, and occasional triumph.
At Zarminali, our clinicians have seen it all — the toddlers who proudly announce “I did it!” and the ones who sprint in the opposite direction at the mere mention of the potty.
To help you navigate this milestone, we turned to Maya King, MSN, CPNP-PC, who sees families at Zarminali Pediatrics – Perimeter in Atlanta, Georgia. Maya takes a holistic approach to care — one that nurtures physical, emotional and social well-being.
She’s here to help you:
“Potty training shouldn’t have any negative connotations,” Maya says. “Make it as fun as possible for both of you.”
There’s no single magic age when potty training “should” begin.
In general, children’s bodies become physically ready around 18 months — their bladder and bowels can hold waste long enough to make it to the potty. But cognitive and emotional readiness — understanding what’s happening, remembering to go, and wanting to try — often come later. The American Academy of Pediatrics reports that toilet training in the United States usually begins between ages 2 and 3, and most children are bowel and bladder trained by age 4.
As Maya explains, “Every child is different. Some are ready early, and others need more time. It’s important not to force it — readiness makes all the difference.”
Here are four common signs your child may be ready to start:
Your child starts to recognize physical cues — maybe they pause mid-play or hide in a corner when they need to go.
“The biggest sign to look for is communication,” says Maya. That could mean using words or gestures like tugging at a diaper. Kids with speech delays may take longer, but visual tools, other forms of communication, and speech delay support can help.
Awareness of being wet or soiled shows that your child understands cause and effect — a key step toward learning.
“A child needs some sort of interest for it to be successful,” Maya explains. “If they’re forced, they can develop negative associations and regress later.” You can build interest by reading potty-themed books, singing songs, or letting them watch a kid-friendly video about using the potty.
Parents often ask whether potty training a boy is any different from potty training a girl. The fundamentals are identical: watch for readiness, keep it positive, and follow your child's lead. That said, [a study in Pediatrics that followed toddlers month by month] found that girls tend to master nearly all toilet training skills a little earlier than boys, and on average they finish training a few months sooner too. The same study found that most children, boys and girls alike, are not ready to begin until after their second birthday. Boys often do best learning to pee sitting down first, then standing once the routine feels solid. Readiness matters far more than gender, so start when your child shows the signs above, whichever child you're training.
By making using the potty fun, your child will associate positive feelings with it.
Children learn best through encouragement, not embarrassment. Avoid shaming language like “You’re a big kid now — don’t act like a baby.” It might spark short-term compliance, but it can backfire emotionally. Instead, celebrate small wins and normalize the messier moments.
Starting at less-busy times can also help. Avoid embarking on this adventure if there are other big changes already happening — moving, a new baby arriving, an especially demanding month at work.
Try these practical and playful ways to make toilet training fun:
These small touches help turn the bathroom into a place of confidence, not conflict.
If you’ve ever thought, “Maybe we’ll just skip this whole potty thing and send them to college in diapers,” take a deep breath. Every child gets there at their own pace.
“There’s no rush,” Maya reminds parents. “It’s a marathon, not a sprint. You’ll take a couple steps forward, a couple back — that’s okay. That’s just part of the process.”
Here’s how to handle common bumps along the way:
You don’t have to do it all at once. “Focus on one thing at a time,” says Maya. “Maybe the first goal is staying dry during the day.” Once that’s consistent, you can move onto the next goal, such as using the toilet for number two or staying dry at night.
Nighttime dryness, for example, often takes longer because it’s tied to deeper sleep cycles. Pull-ups or protective sheets are perfectly fine tools during this stage, even if they’re keeping underwear dry during the day. Nighttime potty training truly runs on its own clock: the AAP notes that studies have found about 15% of 5- and 7-year-olds still wet the bed, so patience here is not just okay, it’s expected.
“Potty training is made of lots of small victories,” Maya explains. “It’s okay to pause, regroup, and move at your child’s pace.”
Comparing siblings or other kids can make parents feel pressured, but it’s rarely helpful. “Every kid learns to walk and talk at their own pace,” says Maya. “This is the same.”
Regression, slower progress, and uneven milestones (like peeing before pooping) are all normal. “Going number one and number two are two different processes,” she notes. “Some kids master peeing in a month but take much longer to poop comfortably.”
In short: progress looks different for everyone — and that’s okay.
Most potty training bumps resolve with time and reassurance. But if you notice ongoing issues, your pediatrician can help rule out medical causes or suggest behavioral strategies.
Maya advises reaching out if:
“What we want to avoid,” Maya says, “is it being painful to poop. Once it hurts, kids are reluctant to try again.”
Zarminali clinicians are always here to guide you through these transitions. If you’re unsure whether something is normal, it’s never too early to ask. Need a pediatrician who will partner with you through potty training and every milestone that follows? Schedule a visit with one of our clinicians.
References
1. American Academy of Pediatrics. (n.d.). Bedwetting: 3 common reasons & what families can do. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/Bedwetting.aspx
2. American Academy of Pediatrics. (n.d.). Choosing a potty. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/Choosing-a-Potty.aspx
3. American Academy of Pediatrics. (n.d.). How to tell when your child is ready. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/How-to-Tell-When-Your-Child-is-Ready.aspx
4. American Academy of Pediatrics. (n.d.). The right age to potty train. https://www.healthychildren.org/English/ages-stages/toddler/toilet-training/Pages/the-right-age-to-toilet-train.aspx
5. Schum, T. R., Kolb, T. M., McAuliffe, T. L., Simms, M. D., Underhill, R. L., & Lewis, M. (2002). Sequential acquisition of toilet-training skills: A descriptive study of gender and age differences in normal children. Pediatrics, 109(3), E48. https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/11875176/